Cavemen? Really?

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Honestly, when the Atkins Diet first gained traction I was in disbelief.  Certainly no one, anywhere, ever, would throw out hundreds of years of nutritional evolution and adopt a diet that says eat everything that we know is bad for us!  Right?  Wrong.  The Atkins revolution literally dissolved all brain cells attaching human behavior to sound nutrition.

And now – is it possible? – real living, breathing, reading, thinking, eating people actually believe that cavemen – CAVEMEN – carried the secrets of healthy living and healthy dining!  According to this myth (apparently a credible one to millions of people), perpetrated by a host of crackpots with MD’s after their names (along with Cross Fit trainers!), our bodies evolved to process meats and vegetables and digest those well.  Grains came later and we still struggle to digest them — and they aren’t good for us!  Really?

Absolutely astonishing!  Eating grains should be the last of our worries.  On the other hand, our bodies haven’t evolved one iota toward either carnivore or omnivore anatomies.  Our digestive tracks still look completely herbivore.  When are they going to catch up to the caveman’s purported craving for meat?

I would refer you to my Paleolithic era dietitian, the famous Ice Man of Bolzano — aka Ötzi.   To come clean here, Ötzi died a long, long time ago – from an episode of violence, not from coronary artery disease.  And what was in his lunch box when he was found (well – in his leather pouch)?  Legumes!  How about that you Paleo Diet aficionados?  Legumes – the supposed bane of the cavemen.

Let’s briefly review how real carnivores and omnivores dine.  They snatch prey with their paws and teeth, rip it apart and devour it.  And that’s the way they’ve been doing it since way back in the, say, Paleo era – even before.  They don’t score high in etiquette.

Humans, on the other hand, have been around since before they discovered fire.  After all, they couldn’t discover fire before they were around, right?  And those humans – those pre-fire humans – did very well on diets comprised exclusively of vegetation.  And, same as today, they wouldn’t have done well eating the way self-respecting carnivores eat – using the rip-apart and devour-directly method.  Bad diseases from doing that!